Banh Mi

Let's talk about the fact that the meat inside a banh mi is basically the worst part. In fact, when my parents used to buy me ones in my childhood, I used to pull the meat out. Why? Because I really, really like the crusty bread and pickles and felt the meat sullied the flavour. And also because Asian deli/cold meats are the bane of my existence. Cold meats are already pretty shitty, let's keep it real. But Asian cold meats? Do we know what's in there? Is it really meat or is it a mixture of gutter scrapings?

I bit into a banh mi yesterday, my first in a long time. I've come to even enjoy the pate for its creamy saltiness (which is interesting because if any component of the banh mi could be made of gutter scrapings, it's probably the pate). I've come to enjoy the pickled carrots and cucumber even more than I used to. I've come to palate the meat because it seems rude to pull it out. Starving children, people seem to really enjoy the meat etc. It seems wasteful to not eat it. If I ever start my own banh  mi business, I'm going to start selling just pickles and bread. Also, the next time I buy a banh mi, I'm going to ask for no meat.

"No meat?" the elderly female Vietnamese vendor will say.
"No meat," I will affirm.
"Just pickles?"
"Just pickles," I will say. She will stare at me. I will smile at her until she looks away because people tend to do that when I smile at them.
"Just pickles," she will say after a while, slightly suspicious of me. Then she will hand me my sandwich of delicious pickles and bread.

The pate can stay as well. And the fact that I cannot get the little French accent thing over the "e" in pate is killing me.

Go forth.

J