The Truth of the Matter

I shit on hipsters every single day. Not literally but mentally. I look at them and I vom a little in my mouth.

But the fact is, I wish I could pull off being a hipster. If I was an emaciated Caucasian girl, maybe I could wear some of those wool sweaters and fedoras (a little too mainstream for your average, mainstream hipster).

I (secretly) wish I could have that well-perfected hipster hair. White girls with slightly lank, very long, soft-looking (like baby ducklings...) hair that is so often worn seemingly unbrushed and draped across slender shoulders (not going to happen: my shoulders could be described as either robust or infamous).

A candid confession from me. Until the day I turn into a frighteningly thin (I always imagine they have really bad breath for some reason...) White girl who has multiple satchels and various brogues/oxfords, I will continue to shit on hipsters in a daily fashion.

J