I really dislike my mother right now: we are in the process of looking for a cake to buy for my grandpa's 90th birthday on Monday so are looking at websites for the cake shops around here. I see a chocolate and praline cake and exclaim the name with glee. She yells at me, "THE CAKE ISN'T FOR YOU." She wants to get him a "soft cake" because he will only eat things that have basically been already chewed for him. She is in desire of a black forest cake. I ask her if she even likes black forest cake.
"THE CAKE ISN'T FOR YOU, BITCH," she yells at me (verbatim, mark my words). WELL, SORRY, BITCH. I was just showing some concern that grandpa might not be in favour of black forest which has cherries and liquor when he is a man of simple tastes like plain chocolate cake or plain vanilla. I could cut someone right now.
In process: phasing out of low-rise jeans from my closet in favour of mid/high-rise to prevent plumber's shot from escaping and warding off all potential male suitors.
Also: bought too many clothes this holidays.
Also: called up the girls I tutor yesterday and have ascertained that indeed I will be tutoring them this year. Panicked for a moment because they went back to school at least a week ago and still hadn't called me. I was sure they did not want my services any more because I increased my charge by $5 (I was already charging them less as they are of the family friend variety). Was ready to call them cheap-ass mofos.
J
About Me
- Junaberry
- I'm a student from Australia who used to have a lot of time on her hands but doesn't have that much anymore. Now she has other stuff on her hands.
4 comments:
You should make him a cake out of 50c softserves - cost effective and to his tastes. Chocolate praline > black forest.
It's so weird, I can't get over your Mum's swearing. My Mum would totes say something like that - I mean, is the name calling really necessary?
No plumber's shot > plumber's shot :)
dear little mishelle
the swearing part was sarcasm. but she does swear.
i dislike black forest when it comes from the shop because i find the taste of liquor and artificial cherry way too strong.
LOL
At first I thought you must be kidding - I was like 'surely Aunty M is not that harsh!' Then I remembered you said she swears and your reaction to it suggested it wad possible....I also thought my mother would probs say something like that, so perhaps yours would too.
Well black forest is like 50% cream, and I don't like cream, plus I agree with the artificial cherry/liquor thing.
your mum would not call you a bitch lol. if she did, it would probably be jokingly as in "i ain't raisin no babies, bitch"
yeah but i guess it is for my grandpa so he'll probably like the cream which is like eating air which is soft and does not require chewin.
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