Loose and Free Yoghurt

I had a pear Chobani with chopped almonds and cornflakes (haters to da left) this morning for breakfast. It was so delicious. I hate pears. This yoghurt tasted almost exactly like pears. It contained pears. It was still delicious. I demand that all future consumption of pears comes in yoghurt form. 

This was after a sick 26.12 minute run in which I finally conquered a couple of hills. I have a fear of running up hills because I'm convinced that I'll be too tired after the hill to continue running and therefore my whole run will be ruined. I was very tired after the hill but then I pretended I was trying to keep up with some HG who was running with me. This gave me the energy to continue. 

Around five minutes from home, I started getting a stitch. Like, "I think my caecum is trying to eat my appendix," kind of stitch. I said to myself, "Self, if you don't dominate this stitch then you can't call yourself... someone who dominates stitches." So I started sprinting home. The stitch got a lot worse. To relieve myself, I started rolling around on the wet grass as soon as I got home. The stitch went away. New cure for stitches. You're welcome.

I went on a new route because the other route was giving me Running Constipation. This is when running is like Being Constipated. Obviously, running should be loose and free. Thankfully, today's run was very loose and free. 

I'm going to stocktake at work in a couple of hours. At stocktake, I will be spending close to 10 hours in the vicinity of R. Should I bring a condom just in case?

Some thoughts for you to ponder.

Over & out.

J