Only Me

As I become older, I also become increasingly aware of what it is to be me. And not someone else. As in, I'm not someone else. I'm me. There is no other me. I am me. I am all me. I am woman. I am now distracted. I ate porridge for breakfast.

The thing is, no one will ever be in my head and I will never be in someone else's head. I used to get scared that there were mind readers around, listening to my every thought. Wouldn't that be horrific (unless the mind reader was super hot and sparkly)? But now I know that they probably don't exist (and if they do, please let them be super hot, sparkly and deeply moved by my very profound and intelligent everyday thoughts).

I wonder what people would think if they were inside my head. Would they be disturbed or amused? Or would it be normal to them? Do we all think in similar ways? I wonder a lot what other people are thinking and whether they think in the same way as me. I wonder what that really attractive, popular girl is thinking as she walks down a busy road. I wonder how aware she is of her own good looks. I wonder about it all but I will never know. What is her thought process when someone bumps into her? When someone is rude to her?

What is that really rude customer thinking? What is that really nice person thinking (I confess that I believe they are thinking nasty thoughts underneath that sugary exterior)?

I think it really is excellent that our thoughts are our own and no one will ever know them (if we choose not to share). This is one of the main reasons that I (sometimes) enjoy taking public transport. I like to sit in that window seat and become lost in my own thoughts. They are usually about food or boys (like many of my conversations with friends) but they are my own and I feel safe there.

J