This Bitch

I feel like I've been posting some really poor stuff on here. I remember when I used to blog about my friends and I would get shit tonnes of comments. Who doesn't like to read about themselves? I know I do. I guess I should start again... Reel in the readers.

Anyway, I was meant to have lunch with Big Michelle after our lectures today but... she had other plans (Big Michelle, do you give me permission to write stuff about that here or is that a nogo?). So, I went off to find somewhere to sit and eat. Then I thought to myself, "Fuck this. I don't want to be alone right now. Give me stimulation, please." So I send out various texts to (in this respective order): Little Mishelle, Sarah and Kim. Little Mishelle replies back with this: "SOZ BRO, I'M IN STUDIO SCARFING DOWN FOOD SO I CAN GET BACK TO WORK 'COS I'M A WORK FREAK," except not in so many words but I could just sense the hysteria from reading her text. Naturally, I was all, "Pfft, this bitch," and replied with as much. She just kept saying, "Soz bro," what a little devil. Sarah replies back with something about Susan Boyle and how much she loves her? I forget.

Here's when I blacked out and fell down the Sciby steps (har har, just jokes).

I get a call from Kim and meet her in the Susan Boyle meeting room (I know, UWA is so with the times, naming a room after a 2008 ? X Factor contestant). I meet Sarah at the bottom of the stairs. It's an ominous start. She leads me up the staircase and I walk into...

A RELAY FOR LIFE MEETING.

They have me NO indication WHATSOEVER of what I was walking into. I'm sorry but for those who know me, I generally lack any moral fibre or community spirit or sympathy or empathy or anything like that. So, I sat awkwardly on my chair (sharing with Sarah) while listening to some random talk about running in circles for 24 hours (a little concerning, but whatever, some people like running...). I don't know, was I the only one a little annoyed by her demeanour? I found her kind of pompous. I generally tend to nitpick on people like that because they just grate on my nerves. I feel like any second they're going to jump into this spiel about how their grandfather was a war veteran and that's why Anzac Day is so special to them.

Sorry, was that too harsh? Lol 'sif.

Anyway, things got better when we went downstairs to the Refectory to eat some food. That I approve of. And we met Peter, Travis and Helen. I swear, the Refectory is some sort of watering hole where all the Badass Ballaz Kids go to hang.

I kind of find Peter a bit irritating too (shh...). Peter just strikes me as so phony sometimes with how he's all philosophical and ironic and shit. I feel like saying, "Buddy, stfu. We get it. You're philosophical. Now go eat some cake." There's nothing wrong with being thought provoking but Lord, not everyone is like that 24/7. Does he ever think to himself, "Gee, I'm hungy. Where's that KFC voucher?" or, "I really really need to chuck a piss." I'm sure he does but he just doesn't want to tarnish people's perception of him as some sort of modern day Aristotle. I don't think so, buddy.

Also, every single time I've been to the Ref since school started, I practically see Helen there every time. She is like the Queen of the Ref or something with her minions making her sandwiches and shit. Bitch is trippin'. Has she not heard of Broadway and their sumptuous kebabs and noodles and things of deliciousness?

But nah, her friends all seem to be Whities and I get why'd they'd be intimidated by the copious amout of Asian in that general vicinity. They'd stumble out, rubbing at their eyes and smelling like Hokkien mee. Poor white folk.

That reminds me. I laughed at a certain line in the latest userealbutter.com blog post. It was funny. It was about her husband (who is white) and kim chi. Go read it, bitches.

J